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Reasons Why The World Won’t End Today (OR Oct. 21, 2011, OR Dec. 21, 2012)

May 21, 2011

(NOTE: Before you read this, please understand that it’s written in sarcasm. I do not believe any of this rapture stuff for a second, it’s just supposed to be a humorous blog post. I also am not biased against all Christians or Atheists, as I myself am somewhere in between the two at the moment. Ok, you can proceed now…)

Oh… you didn’t hear? Or maybe you did hear, but you misunderstood. You’ve heard that the world is supposedly ending today. You might have heard that it’s supposed to end around 6pm wherever you are, and that you’ll either ascend into heaven or die here on earth by earthquake, fire or brimstone (or what-the-hell-ever).

But apparently we’ve misunderstood! While the “saved” are supposed to be ascending into heaven today (including the guy that started this nonsense, Harold Camping), it’s not the whole planet that’s dying today. While the earthquakes are supposed to happen wherever you are at 6pm, the actual end of the world isn’t supposed to happen until Oct. 21, 2011. Today is “judgement” day, and Oct. 21, 2011 is “the end”. So we get to hear about this nonsense all over again in October. Or maybe not if the people that thought they would go to heaven today (Harold Camping included) are still here. Or maybe we’re just ALL going to hell. 

There’s an argument for it (completely sarcastic & humorous, though— like Ke$ha taking a shower, for example): 

50 Reasons Why The World Is Definitely Ending On Saturday

But mostly there are plenty of reasons why the world will not end today, nor Oct. 21st. Some have already been listed by other websites. But here are a few more reasons why the world won’t end, listed by me:

  • My sister’s prom is this evening, after 6pm. Come to think of it, I bet proms are happening in a lot of other high schools today. I don’t think God would purposely make kids miss prom.
  • I haven’t met any of the Backstreet Boys yet. (What? I like them. Better than being a Justin Bieber fan. I’ve said this before, and I’ll say it again— don’t judge me. Besides, God’s already doing that today anyway, right?)
  • I haven’t done 99% of the stuff on this list.
  • Linsday Lohan, Charlie Sheen & Paris Hilton are still alive.
  • The world is not gonna end 9-10 days before Halloween. Kids (& some young adults) missing out on buckets of candy & wearing cute costumes? No.
  • Both sensible Christians (yes, they DO exist) & atheists agree that the world isn’t ending on these days/dates. Christians & atheists rarely agree on anything.

Then, for those that actually believe in the Bible & that there’s a God:

“No one knows when that day or hour will come— not the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.” —International Standard Version (©2008)

So even the Bible is like “Uh, no, not even.” If you’re not God, you don’t know shit.

So… I think that pretty much sums up what I wanted to say about why you don’t have to worry about the world ever ending when someone says it will. But have fun making rapture-related gifs, playlists & blog posts. I’m really enjoying reading them, lol.

See you tomorrow for sure… and feel free to watch any of these rapture/doomsday-related films for more amusement.

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